Melbourne mum Kate Harvey opens up on ‘sex awakening’ at 50 after hubby had affair

• Kate Harvey divorced her husband in 2019
• She no longer wants a monogamous relationship
• Ms Harvey said her daughters encouraged her to try sex toys

A single mother has revealed how her two daughters encouraged her to try out sex toys after her 25-year marriage broke down – before spending a “fun year” sleeping with up to a dozen different men.

Kate Harvey, a mother-of-three from Melbourne who owns two successful businesses, has spoken of her “mid-life sexual awakening” after divorcing her husband of 25 years when she discovered he was having an affair.

Ms Harvey candidly shared that her husband was the only person she had slept with when she was 50, but over the past year she had had several intimate partners.

She was on her way to work in 2019 when she got a call from a stranger saying her husband was having an affair with his partner – and sent him a screenshot of an email to prove it.

After initially thinking it was mistaken identity, Ms Harvey went through her husband’s laptop and discovered he had created an account on Ashley Madison – a dating site for married people – and had spoken to many women.

“I found his profile. He had talked to hundreds of women and dated a few of them. He had a whole story about it,” she told Mamma Mia.

Ms Harvey met her husband while working in the UK when she was 18 and said she ‘could have sworn black and blue’ that he would never have cheated.

The couple eventually separated and her husband moved out in September 2019.

Ms Harvey, now 51, spent the next two and a half years focusing on herself and helping her children through the trauma of her marriage breakdown.

It was then that her daughters, aged 25 and 18, asked her if she wanted to go out again.

“And I said, ‘Look, I don’t really need a partner to feel better. I already feel better.” And – having full and candid conversations – I said, ‘I miss sex but I don’t want to interact with men right now. They’re not on my favorites lists,” Ms. Harvey said.

His daughters then recommended that he try sex toys.

“They said, ‘Mum, you should try the toys because it’s a lot more open these days with the youngsters and we’re all talking about it, we’ve got it, so you should give it a try.’

“That night they told me about their favorites and we went surfing.”

Ms Harvey then slowly turned to the idea of ​​dating again and dove into the dating app pool.

During an appearance on SBS’ Insight this week, Ms Harvey revealed she no longer craves monogamous relationships and enjoys spending time with her “friends with benefits”.

She said that in January last year she slept with just one man – her husband – and by December that number was between ten and 12.

“I stopped counting after a while,” she said on the show.

While some of her “friends with benefits” came from dating apps, she met others in real life.

“The youngest I slept with was 28 and the oldest was 48,” Ms Harvey said.

‘My sweet spot is 38 to 44 (years).’

Ms Harvey said that because she had spent time working on herself, she felt confident about meeting new people and said she had been with men she could only ever have been with. “dreaming” of being before.

She said that while her sexual relationship with her husband was “fun and fulfilling at times”, she was now focusing on things she wanted to explore.

“Things like rough play and role-playing and increased toy use and all of those things that are a tough conversation to have with someone you’re in a long-term relationship with,” he said. she stated on Insight.

“The younger ones are fit enough to be able to pick you up, push you against the wall, and throw you on the bed.”

“In my personal and professional life, I’m in charge, so it’s nice to give up that control and just be controlled and dominated.”

Although not everyone has been so open to Ms Harvey’s lifestyle, with the mum admitting she has lost friends who have not been so supportive.